OK, so here's what's likely happened. Valentine's Day has snuck up on you and you haven't yet gotten around to sending to your sweetheart one! What are you going to do?
Well, you could scramble and maybe find a "so-so" card at the local drugstore. (You know, one of the cards that has been left because all the good cards have been purchased already.) Or, you could go online and find one of those funny animated cards. (You know, the kind with the goofy animals singing goofy songs.)
Well, maybe not - but you still need something.
If you have just enough time, you could find a nice looking card on the Internet that you can add your own verse to and print it off. (Click on the Funny Valentine Card link below for one of my funny verses that you can use.)
But, if you're really stuck and you need something to compose and send off NOW, then "X" your choice of words or phrases in the following Valentine's email and send it off instead. (The quality won't be there but at least the thought will get there on time.)
To Whom It May Concern:
(No, I wouldn't use that. Put "Dearest" and the person's name in here or something romantic and then remove this sentence.)
No one else could [ ]dissect a frog [ ]shoot peas out their nose [ ]talk to the trees [ ]understand me [ ]wear support hose [ ]"slurp" spaghetti [ ]herd cats [ ]scare ghosts like you do.
With just one look you can [ ]make me laugh [ ]stop a buffalo stampede [ ]intimidate lions [ ]make me happy [ ]cause a forest fire [ ]thaw frozen food [ ]cast a spell [ ]scare Dracula [ ]cause nightmares.
You're not just a good friend, you're [ ]scary [ ]psychic [ ]washable [ ]ovoid [ ]mechanically inclined [ ]a basket case [ ]older [ ]younger [ ]diet savvy [ ]off the wall [ ]a wallflower [ ]my best friend!
I'm lucky to have [ ]a riding mower [ ]green plants [ ]someone like you [ ]trash bags [ ]an oboe [ ]my own hair [ ]a speech therapist [ ]rubber boots [ ]my therapy group [ ]a fear of shag carpets.
(These directions are for Outlook Express users but will generally be the same for all email programs.)
Open your email program and click on the "Create Mail" button.
Return to this Valentine page and highlight the verse above.
Right-click on the highlighted text and click "copy".
Return to your email program and in the box below the subject line; click once to get the cursor in the box and then right-click on the mouse and click "paste" and the text (from above) will be transferred into the body of your email.
Put a CAPITAL "X" in the brackets beside the words or phrases you want to use in your message.
Add your name at the end.
If you are sending this email to an individual, then you will also want to type his/her name at the top.
You may then want to enter a word or two in the "Subject" line. (What's the email about?)
Finally, you must enter your sweetheart's email address and click send. (Hopefully, you can just select his or her email address from your address book.)
Then, send it off.
If you have enough time to find a card and send it off instead of this email, then try clicking above.
Go to the Funny Email Messages page for lots of other funny messages you can create and send.