Mothers Day

So, on Mothers Day, it's possible that either you or your mother (or both of you) have a sense of humor. Do you want to find out for sure?

This will be a good test.

Be forwarned that many moms don't want humor on their day! They want love and flowers and all kinds of "mushy" things. So, if you give them straight humor, they may be laughing on the outside, but not on the inside.

Therefore, use this funny email message at your own risk.

PS
I also have a funny Mothers Day greeting card verse in my Greeting Cards area that you can try as well if you just want a short note. Click here to check it out.


Dear Mom:

Over the years I've watched you [ ]eat chocolate [ ]wash clothes [ ]lose socks [ ]lose weight [ ]gain weight [ ]cook food [ ]burn food [ ]drive me everywhere [ ]change your mind [ ]lose your mind [ ]park the car [ ]care for me [ ]do the chicken dance

and it seems to me that you are [ ]losing weight [ ]losing your mind [ ]deserving of praise [ ]hallucinating [ ]psychic [ ]under suspicion [ ]still talking with your mouth full [ ]good at grape peeling [ ]shorter [ ]smarter [ ]very under-rated [ ]ready for American Idol.

You've made our family life [ ]exciting [ ]depressing [ ]a disaster [ ]interesting [ ]awesome [ ]richer [ ]weird [ ]rare [ ]funky [ ]better than a Rolling Stone road trip

so, I'd like to [ ]warn you about your winter coat [ ]wish you well at the Mickey Mouse Club reunion show [ ]thank you deeply [ ]send you fifty pounds of pretzels [ ]give you a standing ovation [ ]move out [ ]get my head examined.

Love forever,


How To Transfer The Verse From This Mothers Day Template Into Your Email Program

(These directions are for Outlook Express users but will generally be the same for all email programs.)

Open your email program and click on the "Create Mail" button.

Return to this page and highlight the verse above.

Right-click on the highlighted text and click "copy".

Right-click on the highlighted text and click "copy".

Return to your email program and in the box below the subject line; click once to get the cursor in the box and then right-click on the mouse and click "paste" and the text (from above) will be transferred into the body of your email.

Put a CAPITAL "X" in the brackets beside the words or phrases you want to use in your message.

Add your name at the end.

You may then want to enter a word or two in the "Subject" line. (What's the email about?)

Finally, you must enter your mom's email address and click send. (Hopefully, you can just select her email address from your address book.)


This Isn't Funny!

Connect On Mother's Day

This isn't funny but it is worth reading and passing along to any mothers you know:

This is for the mothers who have sat up all night with sick toddlers in their arms, wiping up barf laced with Oscar Mayer wieners and cherry Kool-Aid saying, "It's okay, honey, Mommy's here."

Who have sat in rocking chairs for hours on end soothing crying babies who can't be comforted.

This is for all the mothers who show up at work with spit-up in their hair and milk stains on their blouses and diapers in their purses.

For all the mothers who run carpools and make cookies and sew Halloween costumes. And all the mothers who DON'T.

This is for the mothers who gave birth to babies they'll never see. And the mothers who took those babies and gave them homes.

This is for the mothers whose priceless art collections are hanging on their refrigerator doors.

And for all the mothers who froze their buns on metal bleachers at football or soccer games instead of watching from the warmth of their cars.

And that when their kids asked, "Did you see me, Mom?" they could say, "Of course, I wouldn't have missed it for the world," and meant it.

This is for all the mothers who yell at their kids in the grocery store and swat them in despair when they stomp their feet and scream for ice cream before dinner. And for all the mothers who count to ten instead, but realize how child abuse happens.

This is for all the mothers who sat down with their children and explained all about making babies. And for all the (grand)mothers who wanted to, but just couldn't find the words.

This is for all the mothers who go hungry, so their children can eat.

For all the mothers who read "Goodnight, Moon" twice a night for a year. And then read it again. "Just one more time."

This is for all the mothers who taught their children to tie their shoelaces before they started school. And for all the mothers who opted for Velcro instead.

This is for all the mothers who teach their sons to cook and their daughters to sink a jump shot.

This is for every mother whose head turns automatically when a little voice calls "Mom?" in a crowd, even though they know their own offspring are at home -- or even away at college or have their own families.

This is for all the mothers who sent their kids to school with stomach aches, assuring them they'd be just FINE once they got there, only to get calls from the school nurse an hour later asking them to please pick them up. Right away.

This is for mothers whose children have gone astray, who can't find the words to reach them.

For all the mothers who bite their lips until they bleed when their 14-year-olds dye their hair green.

For all the mothers of the victims of recent school shootings, and the mothers of those who did the shootings.

For the mothers of the survivors, and the mothers who sat in front of their TVs in horror, hugging their children who just came home from school safely.

This is for all the mothers who taught their children to be peaceful, and now pray they come home safely from a war.

What makes a good mother anyway? Is it patience? Compassion? Broad hips? The ability to nurse a baby, cook dinner, and sew a button on a shirt, all at the same time?

Or is it in her heart?

Is it the ache you feel when you watch your son or daughter disappear down the street, walking to school alone for the very first time?

The jolt that takes you from sleep to dread, from bed to crib at 2 A.M. to put your hand on the back of a sleeping baby?

The panic, years later, that comes again at 2 A.M. when you just want to hear their key in the door and know they are safe again in your home?

Or the need to flee from wherever you are and hug your child when you hear news of a fire, a car accident, a child dying?

The emotions of motherhood are universal and so our thoughts are for young mothers stumbling through diaper changes and sleep deprivation... And mature mothers learning to let go.

For working mothers and stay-at-home mothers.

Single mothers and married mothers.

Mothers with money, mothers without.

This is for you all. For all of us...

Hang in there. In the end we can only do the best we can. Tell them every day that we love them. And pray and never stop being a mom.

Please pass along to all the moms in your life.

"Home is what catches you when you fall - and we all fall."

Please pass this on to a wonderful mother you know on Mothers Day.

(Received from FranCMT2)


Funny Mothers Day Card

Go here to check out the funny Mother's Day Card verse that you can put on a real card if this email seems too impersonal.

Funny Email Messages

Go to the Funny Email Messages main page where you will find many other funny emails to send.


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Please note that the "What's New?" section below is updated whenever something I think is funny comes along, therefore some of these "New" blogs further down the page may already have been replaced by the time you click on them!

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