Funny Medicine

This funny medicine page is the result of me receiving several emails containing funny medical terms that I thought would make a good theme page on this site. (Maybe you'll agree.) 

It's impossible to know if someone's sense of humor is similar to yours without spending some time with them, of course, but I like to think that my humor is fairly broad and that probably you'll at least get a smile out of these definitions (below).

So, let's start off with this funny explanation of medical terms and then maybe I'll add more medical humor as it comes along.

The danger when doing something like this is that you may have heard of many of these humorous definitions before. The hope is that you will find some that you haven't seen before! (And if you have one that's not listed here - send it to me so I can add it in! You'll find a form below to do that.)

That will (hopefully) make your time spent on this page worthwhile.

Anyway, here they are. I hope you enjoy them. After all, a joke is a joke.


Funny Medicine Medical Terms:

Some Medical Things Are Funny

Artery - The study of paintings
Bacteria - Back door to cafeteria
Barium - What doctors do when patients die
Benign - What you be, after you be eight
Caesarean Section - A neighbourhood in Rome
Cat Scan - Searching for kitty
Cauterize - Made eye contact with her
Colic - A sheep dog
Coma - A punctuation mark
Dilate - To live long
Electile Dysfunction - The inability to become aroused over any of the choices for President
Enema - Not a friend

Fester - Quicker than someone else
Fibula - A small lie
Impotent - Distinguished, well known
Labour Pain - Getting hurt at work
Medical Staff - A doctor's cane
Morbid - A higher offer
Nitrates - Rates of pay for working at night, (normally more money than days)
Node - I knew it
Outpatient - A person who has fainted
Pelvis - Second cousin to Elvis
Post Operative - A letter carrier
Recovery Room - Place to do upholstery
Rectum - Nearly killed him
Secretion - Hiding something
Seizure - Roman emperor
Tablet - A small table
Terminal Illness - Getting sick at the airport
Tumour - One plus one more
Urine - Opposite of you're out

Have you got another funny medical term that's not listed above?

Let me know in the form below and I'll give you credit for it!

[ ? ]

Author Information (optional)

To receive credit as the author, enter your information below.

(first or full name)

(e.g., City, State, Country)

Submit Your Contribution

  •  submission guidelines.


(You can preview and edit on the next page)

Fun Jokes

Click here to go from this Funny Medicine page to the Fun Jokes Page and look for lots of other funny things to smile at.


- Return To Home Page


Please note that the "What's New?" section below is updated whenever something I think is funny comes along, therefore some of these "New" blogs further down the page may already have been replaced by the time you click on them!

What's New?

  1. Last Kiss - A Singalong "Tragedy" Oldie

    Aug 22, 19 12:00 AM

    Here's a "tear-jerker" from J. Frank Wilson and the Cavaliers - done on my 12-string. Join in. Lyrics are included.

    Read More

  2. The Shape I'm In - A Singalong Song

    Aug 15, 19 12:00 AM

    Here's one from The Band. It doesn't have the organ solo from the original, but it does have the lyrics, so join in.

    Read More

  3. Sing Along To Lawdy Miss Clawdy

    Aug 09, 19 12:00 AM

    Here's a song Elvis sung at the dawn of rock and roll. Lyrics are included, so join in!

    Read More

  4. Sing Along To "You Got What It Takes"

    Jul 11, 19 12:00 AM

    Here's an oldie by The Dave Clark Five. I play it on my 12-string and sing along and you can too because the lyrics are included.

    Read More

  5. Sing This One - My Maria

    Jun 27, 19 12:00 AM

    This one's by B.W. Stevenson. (Maybe his only one?) You might remember it.

    Read More

Before You Go...

Check out the page above. You might have missed something!